Medical Questions » Sex Questions » Question No. 865
| Question: | I am a 52 year old man who has recently remarried. My new wife is also a divorcee. We now find sex to be very painful to the point where 1 have a very sore penis, and she bleeds afterwards. We have tried gel but it was still painful. We need your advice. |
| Answer: | There are numerous reasons for this problem, which is a relatively common one. The main reason is a lack of lubrication of the vagina, so the reason for the lack of lubrication is what must be determined.
In younger couples, nervousness, lack of experience, and worries about privacy may be factors.
When the male partner is rather over-enthusiastic, he may not ' warm up' his partner sufficiently. Sexual foreplay is necessary to stimulate the glands in the vagina to produce adequate mucus for lubrication.
In older women, menopause may be a factor, and assuming that your new wife is close to your age, this may be the problem here. If there is insufficient oestrogen produced by the ovaries, then the vaginal glands shrink and cease to function effectively. This can be fixed by appropriate hormone replacement therapy.
There are also a number of generalised diseases that may affect vaginal lubrication, including an underactive thyroid gland (again a problem of middle-aged women). These need to be sought and diagnosed by apptopriate blood tests.
Please discuss your personal problems in more detail with your GP, who will be able to assess and investigate the problem further.
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